Recognizing and Coping with Emotions
GUEST BLOG - Alexandra Theodorakidis, Editorial Assistant at AboutKidsHealth
Depression and anxiety are two major mental health issues on the rise in Canadian children and youth. Approximately five percent of males and 12 percent of females aged 12 to 19 have experienced a major depressive episode. Currently, Canada has the third highest youth suicide rate in the industrialized world.
It is important to discuss mental health issues with your child so that they can gain a better understanding of their own feelings, and learn that there is nothing to be ashamed of when it comes to mental health.
When children cannot express feelings in a healthy way, they may find other outlets for their emotions. For instance, if a child is unable to express feelings of anger or sadness in a safe and constructive manner, they may translate those feelings into bullying a younger sibling or classmate, or they may become withdrawn and unsociable. While older children may be able to recognize feelings of fear or sadness, younger children may not yet have enough experience to allow them to accurately label what they are feeling.
"When children cannot express feelings in a healthy way, they may find other outlets for their emotions."
If you’re worried that something is bothering your child, one of the most important things that you can do is to talk to them, and be there to listen. Maintaining regular communication with your child, even on days when everything is going smoothly, is crucial to helping them feel comfortable talking about how they feel. Try to create a safe space for them to share their feelings with you - avoid telling your child that they should not be feeling that way, as that could make them feel ashamed or embarrassed. Instead, allow your child to tell you why they might be angry or sad, helping them to identify certain triggers that might be causing them to feel this way. Remember, the emotions that your child is feeling may be very new and confusing to them – for you, a schoolyard crush might seem cute and silly, but to them, it is a very big and real issue. It is important to take the issues that they are facing seriously.
When dealing with an upset child it is important for parents to stay patient and not react aggressively. Children will often base their own reactions on those of their parents or other adults. If you get angry when your child is frustrated or upset, you may only cause more distress for your child. If your child is reluctant to talk about their emotions, don’t force them. Let them know that you are there to support them if they need you. Remember that it is also important to help your child identify when they are feeling happy, so that they have a thorough understanding of both their positive and negative emotions. Knowing what situations cause them to experience feelings of happiness could help to give them better coping skills for when they are sad or angry. In this way, you will help them to build the tools to make themselves feel better when they are dealing with difficult situations in the future.
To help children learn about their feelings and how to cope with them, AboutKidsHealth has created an online game called Monarch’s Mission. Aimed at kids aged seven to 12, the game uses the theme of space exploration to help users navigate different situations that can be challenging for children to handle emotionally. The game helps children to understand the connections between these situations and the emotions they are experiencing, and which methods they can use to cope.
